Lenghty names that take your breadth away

As a nation, we’ve never been short of ideas when it comes to creating long names. We’ve made movies with serpentine titles - remember that unforgettably forgettable Mansur Ali Khan flick Rajadi Raja, Raja Marthanda, Raja Gambira, Raja Kulothunga Kaathavaraya Krishna Kamarajan? We’ve had railway stations with more letters than a post office. I am referring to Venkatanarasimha Rajuvaripeta - yup, that godforsaken station in the middle of somewhere near Renigunta. We’ve even had school principals who muscle their way into record books by cramming 1022 words in a book title!

To cut a lamba story short, we are a no-full-stops country with a deep fascination for the unending. No one loves the longiloquent more than us bloody Indians. Or that’s what I thought. Till I trawled the net. A little research killed my freshly baked hypothesis. The fact of the matter is it’s a global phenomenon. Yes my lovelies, I am sorry to say, we are not unique. Everyone everywhere is a sucker for longer-than-long names.

Take the Sri Lankans, for instance. If Warnakulasuriya Patabendige Ushantha Joseph Chaminda Vaas was not enough, they’ve just unleashed the young Uda Walawwe Mahim Bandaralage Chanaka Asanga Welegedara in the Ahmedabad Test Match, on us hapless souls. The Americans are no better. There’s a Texas band called The Clouds That Fondle Jagged Crags And Raging Storms Conspire And You Will Know Us By The Trail Of Dead. And a Philadelphian by the name Adolph Blaine Charles David Earl Frederick Gerald Hubert Irvim John Kenneth Loyd Martin Nero Oliver Paul Quincy Randolph Sherman Thomas Uncas Victor Willian Xerxes Yancy Zeus. If you thought that was a mouthful, wait! What you read just now was only his first name. He’s got a surname with 588 letters!!!

I’ve always wondered what guys like Adolph Blah Blah will do for blocking their priceless domain names. Because domain registrars are notorious for not accepting dot com names longer than 63 characters. May be the only way out is to settle for something like hellopeopleiwantedalongdotcomnameandallthesejokersgavemewasthis.com!